The stale relationship
One of the most common reasons that bring couples to online marriage counseling is because their relationship has become stale. Especially if they have been together for a number of years.
Similarly, there are no recently discovered affairs or out of control arguments or commonly unacceptable behaviour on either side. Likewise, there is nothing major going on, which in some ways might be part of the problem. Couples often talk about not having much in common, not doing much together, feeling disconnected. In a nutshell, they are… bored.
More often than not, one or both parties, have become disillusioned, complacent and uncommunicative. They are at a loss as to how to what to do or how. Despite living in the same house couples often admit to living quite separate lives. Because the connection they once shared has been lost and they have grown apart.
Most of the couples we see claim to still love each other (often due to the history they share). However, they also often admit to not to particularly ‘liking’ or respecting each other anymore. It appears, the characteristics, traits or habits their partner has (which they once might have found endearing) end up being a bone of contention. Resulting in frustration and resentment to the other person.
How online marriage counseling can help
Our couple therapists will help you explore when things started to become stale and why – from your individual perspective. When relationships run into problems, it’s common for individuals to start interpreting the other person’s action negatively. Even though this may happen unconsciously.
Couple counselling will help you understand how each person perceives the others communication style and behaviour examines the meaning the other person places on them. An alternative perspective from a third party enables a new insight and understanding to allow you to move your relationship forward in a positive way.
Our relationship counsellors will help you talk things through calmly to enable you both to gain clarity as to what is going on and the bigger picture. It’s not about attributing blame to either person, it’s about gaining understanding. More often than not, both parties, have unintentionally, played a role in the relationship becoming stale.
Through gentle questioning our online marriage counsellors are quickly able identify any underlying problems within a marriage that need to be addressed. These problems might have gone unsaid or avoided over the years. It can be difficult to tell the truth about what is bothering you within your relationship. It can also be difficult to hear the truth about how our own behaviour isn’t always helpful. However, our experts at online marriage counseling will help you will feel safe enough and comfortable enough to have the confidence to be honest.